BEHOLD! The ACSIIfaun(tm), comes ready to assemble, all you need is a spacebar! Watch and marvel as the slightest tap of the spacebar in the correct places INFLATES and GIVES LIFE to the ASCIIfaun(tm)! See him COME ALIVE and BREATHE as you BAULK at the horrendous USE of CAPS LOCK in this advert!
Instruction manual:
PAGE 1:
Use of this product may result in death, disfiguration, chronic bowel disease, migraines, more migraines, severe trauma to the lower spinal column, tourettes, random outbursts of 1930's show tunes (and associated dance routines), the inability to flip pancakes, a penchant for the colour vermillion, and an odd liking for the game of Ludo.
Pressing the spacebar in certain patterns has been knows to induce epileptic fits in certain members of the population. Please take care not to spill any hot drinks on yourself or others if you find yourself having a fit. This will burn.
PAGE 2:
Required ingredients:
Contained within the plastic packaging is a part-assembled ASCIIfaun(tm). While the product will give enjoyment in its natural state, it is recommended that you assemble the product with the assistance of an adult, or a small bear.
All you will need is your space bar (located on your nearest computer keyboard).
Other tools useful for the job:
- a computer mouse
ASSEMBLY INSTRUCTIONS:
Take your computer's mouse in your preferred hand. If you hear squeaking, or a slight nibbling sensation at the fingertips, discontinue usage immediately and consult a medical professional. Highlight the unassembled ASCIIfaun(tm) and open up a text editing program, such as Wordpad or Notepad++.
Now, copy the ASCIIfaun(tm) into your preferred editing program. Using the space bar, insert spaces into appropriate locations within the ASCIIfaun(tm)'s head. Once the ASCIIfaun(tm) looks somewhat like the original picture, then marvel in amazement as the ASCIIfaun(tm) comes to life and makes you a coffee!
Disclaimer: O_F_R_T_CORP does not accept any liability for your disappointment when using this product. If you have any complaints, please call our customer care line on 999 from the UK, or 911 for American customers.
awesome!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, I like him :D
ReplyDelete^-----^
ReplyDelete[ O.o ]
| |
[ ^ ]
\___/
//
I fail at ASCII art...
Awww it's so cuuute! Can I keep it?
ReplyDelete>.< Stupid HTML whitespace.
ReplyDeleteBEHOLD! The ACSIIfaun(tm), comes ready to assemble, all you need is a spacebar! Watch and marvel as the slightest tap of the spacebar in the correct places INFLATES and GIVES LIFE to the ASCIIfaun(tm)! See him COME ALIVE and BREATHE as you BAULK at the horrendous USE of CAPS LOCK in this advert!
Instruction manual:
PAGE 1:
Use of this product may result in death, disfiguration, chronic bowel disease, migraines, more migraines, severe trauma to the lower spinal column, tourettes, random outbursts of 1930's show tunes (and associated dance routines), the inability to flip pancakes, a penchant for the colour vermillion, and an odd liking for the game of Ludo.
Pressing the spacebar in certain patterns has been knows to induce epileptic fits in certain members of the population. Please take care not to spill any hot drinks on yourself or others if you find yourself having a fit. This will burn.
PAGE 2:
Required ingredients:
Contained within the plastic packaging is a part-assembled ASCIIfaun(tm). While the product will give enjoyment in its natural state, it is recommended that you assemble the product with the assistance of an adult, or a small bear.
All you will need is your space bar (located on your nearest computer keyboard).
Other tools useful for the job:
- a computer mouse
ASSEMBLY INSTRUCTIONS:
Take your computer's mouse in your preferred hand. If you hear squeaking, or a slight nibbling sensation at the fingertips, discontinue usage immediately and consult a medical professional. Highlight the unassembled ASCIIfaun(tm) and open up a text editing program, such as Wordpad or Notepad++.
Now, copy the ASCIIfaun(tm) into your preferred editing program. Using the space bar, insert spaces into appropriate locations within the ASCIIfaun(tm)'s head. Once the ASCIIfaun(tm) looks somewhat like the original picture, then marvel in amazement as the ASCIIfaun(tm) comes to life and makes you a coffee!
Disclaimer: O_F_R_T_CORP does not accept any liability for your disappointment when using this product. If you have any complaints, please call our customer care line on 999 from the UK, or 911 for American customers.
Hahaah! Actually I prefer it the other way. Slightly giraffish, very nice!
ReplyDeleteThe inverted nose gives it a sense of debonair charm and appeal I agree.
ReplyDelete