Transformation

I'm becoming something different
Underneath your hand
Changing form and function in ways I can't understand
Improving, evolving
With each thing I learn
Never quite knowing which way I will turn.
It doesn't feel safe,
But it sure is exciting
My life a blank book that I'm day-by-day writing;
And you are the reason
The real inspiration
I thank you, soul-deep, for this new transformation.

Hope

I confess there's been times
my life has been
So damn stressful, even my weekends
Just aren't restful,
no peace of mind
and none to find
it's left behind.
But best of all, the rest of all my memories fade to grey
Hard to say how or why or when they faded
Left me jaded
Afraid it's gonna stay this way.
I find it's kind of deadening,
my heart a leaden thing
but

I lift my head and sing
Of better things
with angel's wings
that lift me high
to all that I
try to be -
Alive and free
In ivory clouds I fly.

I'll look back, gaze
on the black days
that attack in ways so crushing
Remember the hush of the rushing night
and see I was right
To wait for light to come in sight,

I'm saved by His might.

Come home
It's been too long.
Come home,
It's so easy to miss you
When you were the colour in every day
Now that's faded to grey

To be honest

When left to my own devices
When I'm in the house all alone
I can be myself, do whatever I want,
Ignore social convention
And do the dishes topless.

When nobody's looking my way,
I grin.
Because I know what I'm thinking.
It doesn't even have to be interesting,
But it's a secret, my secret,
And it gives me great satisfaction.

Don't worry. As soon as this poem ends,
I'll close the window into my head
And be respectable
And normal
And thank you for your patience
While I sneak out a little honesty.

Astral darks

I longed to believe that there's good in everyone.
But every chance I gave you
Every time I forgave, forgot
You did it again
Worse every time
Bitterness, anger and lies.
You never spoke a pure and true word
It was poison, it was dark
Alien to me

I'm far from jaded.
It takes more than you to break me.

I still wait to hear that you've changed
Don't know if you ever will
But it's there
An open door
And if you walk through it,
I'll be standing there

Strangers

The world all wants the world to know their name
And everyone's just got themselves to blame
For all those forgotten faces
In those hazy distant places, like next door,
No-one knows their neighbours any more.

But sometimes fairy-lights litter the town,
The flyers go up and the walls all fall down
We dance to the rhythm,
All grudges forgiven, for the night
The festival feels so right.

That carnival culture that sweeps the streets
Gets everyone out, out and up on their feet
Each stranger is a friend,
Nobody wants it to end, but it must
Even the best things come to dust.

And maybe you'll get a curious glance
From a face you remember from some drunken dance
Unknown without the mask,
You're afraid to ask, and what for?
No-one knows their neighbours any more.

This uni work is making me feel a lot like Sisyphus. Every time I feel like I'm getting somewhere, that rock just rolls right the way back down again... blargh.

Interesting thing of the day: bicycle sex is against the law, apparently. Strange world we live in.